The importance of boundaries
- Feb 11, 2017
- 1 min read
The setting of boundaries is not a way of controlling our children's behaviour, neither of limiting their freedom: it is a necessity which supports their developing sense of security and trust while they learn how things in their environment and the world around them work.
When we set a boundary there are a few questions we need to ask ourselves:
- am I ready to stick by it? in other words 'do I really mean it'?
- am I asking too much of my child? are my expectations realistic?
- am I enforcing it with my child's safety in mind?
- am I setting it because it fulfils one of MY needs or my child's?
- does it teach responsibility?
The foundations upon which boundaries lie are common sense: I can't expect my child not to touch any of the cookies if I leave the jar at easy reach...SET THE CHILD UP FOR SUCCESS!
If the child hasn't developed enough self-control, create conditions in which he can carry out what he is asked to/not to do. This will support in the development of a positive self-esteem, since you will not yell out they haven't done "what they were told", and in the meantime you can create other opportunities to develop those skills which are desirable such as impulse inhibition, self-directedness, the power of delaying gratification to name a few.
Let's bring COMMON SENSE BACK!!!
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