Understanding Freedom

Oftentimes, when people hear of "freedom" in a Montessori context they think of unrestrained, unregulated, undisciplined behaviour on the part of the child. In other words, "freedom to do whatever they want"... Not quite so...

Freedom in Montessori terms is one that first and foremost respects the rights and freedom of others: no-one is free to take from others, to be rude etc... Hence, it has limits, boundaries and consequences.

The child is free to experiment, to explore and to carry out own choices (within safe parameters) thus understanding where they lead to. This liberty to experiment and discover is very important because the child's cognitive skills are exercised, stretched and expanded: if the adult is hovering, jumping in giving unrequested help, giving answers, preventing mistakes, the child will slowly but surely develop a mistrust in his/her own abilities and problem-solving skills, and will doubt his/her own intelligence.

Freedom to concentrate, without interruptions, is of particular significance, especially in our technological world where distractions pull us from every direction.

Freedom to follow and cultivate own interests, strengths, tendencies without judgment (often as parents, we have dreams and aspirations FOR our children and we forget that their life is THEIRS...) is one that often is clouded by the pressure to fit within those 'parameters' set by society that we unquestioningly accept.

Freedom to sit with own feelings is a very hard one for us parents to grant: we often are caught in the need to fix our children's problems, while trying to stop them crying, or feeling pain, disappointment etc... But the best way to support them through these inevitable experiences of life is firstly to allow them to feel, allow them to express their feelings, to be heard, understood and accepted for who they are, and then allow them to find their own solutions (they are the ones who know what they really need, at any given time, and we can only offer help when we are asked for it)...

Who said parenting was going to be easy???